Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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