her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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