just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
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I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
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Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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