i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
