So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend