True but thats because hes a fetus.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
