Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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