Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize