Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
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