I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
