Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Randomize
