I'm eating all of the evidence.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
no you cant smoke seaweed
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
