Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Randomize