I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
