Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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