I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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