I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
