Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
