I feel like abortions should bother me more
i just google imaged poop.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
