The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
