bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
only you would photoshop your dick
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Drunk is a universal language darling
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
