and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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