I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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