dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Small penises have feelings too.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
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