Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
