the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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