the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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