Well apparently he's into motor boating.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
