I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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