nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
