lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
