That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
