Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
