we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I did not marry a roomba.
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