Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago

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  (847): i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago http://tfl.nu/60w4
  Replies (29) Good night (5347) Bad night (926)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.

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  (636): I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap. http://tfl.nu/1yuw
  Replies (56) Good night (1125) Bad night (3273)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  my secret santa just gave me a pregency test

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  (360): my secret santa just gave me a pregency test http://tfl.nu/rgpa
  Replies (20) Good night (1322) Bad night (6400)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave

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  (781): I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave http://tfl.nu/vjg2
  Replies (33) Good night (10232) Bad night (1079)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january

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  (720): I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january http://tfl.nu/n365
  Replies (18) Good night (6381) Bad night (1087)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you

  (917): View more from New York City

  Those had pot in them

  (917): View more from New York City

  And good luck on your interview asshole

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  (917): If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you (917): Those had pot in them (917): And good luck on your interview asshole http://tfl.nu/911g
  Replies (51) Good night (17520) Bad night (1693)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...

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  (620): Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me... http://tfl.nu/2n11
  Replies (5) Good night (1097) Bad night (2427)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma

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  (216): For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma http://tfl.nu/ysyc
  Replies (14) Good night (1239) Bad night (3513)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.

  (1-702): View more from Nevada

  True on all accounts.

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  (702): I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me. (1-702): True on all accounts. http://tfl.nu/tt9s
  Replies (13) Good night (3578) Bad night (1056)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.

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  (870): I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office. http://tfl.nu/co4c
  Replies (1) Good night (556) Bad night (728)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.

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  (514): I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed. http://tfl.nu/63hq
  Replies (3) Good night (1507) Bad night (524)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...

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  (630): I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night... http://tfl.nu/aiyg
  Replies (9) Good night (541) Bad night (1020)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?

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  (910): Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too? http://tfl.nu/5t37
  Replies (3) Good night (906) Bad night (604)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all

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  (503): multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all http://tfl.nu/0tag
  Replies (0) Good night (544) Bad night (389)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with

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  (760): People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with http://tfl.nu/de51
  Replies (4) Good night (517) Bad night (210)

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