I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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