You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
