Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
