And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
