Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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