Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
