Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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