she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Randomize
