Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize