I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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