Responsibility does not care about your dick.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize