Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
