I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Randomize