so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Randomize