he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
