Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
