some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
